schtoof

currently, i am eating ice cream and this has to be the most amazing thing that i've put into my mouth in awhile! really it's quite fantastic! aside from this wonderful experience i do have something more important to put out there.

-i've recently developed this kindergarten crush on a guy that i work with. he really is a swell guy, but i've been wondering lately why i am even wasting my time on something that, in the end, will amount to nothing. i surely am not looking for anything serious, especially from a guy here, especially since i am heading back to columbus super soon. i don't think my crush has been obvious because i have been making an effort to NOT make it obvious. the other night however, i was talking to him online, and he pretty much admitted to having feelings for me, but quickly followed that up with "but i don't want to be in a serious relationship"....okay? and? what do you want exactly? i mean, why would he even tell me that he likes me when he doesn't want anything from it. it's like lying all your cards face-up on the table for nothing. i didn't really know what to say. stupidly, i asked if he was just looking to hook up (because i'm so over that). he said no (thank goodness). we then said, pretty generically, that we should hang out soon. and since then, i've had so many things running through my head. and then i came to a conclusion. i do not want to put up with any of this. despite that it could possibly maybe but probably not, turn into something great, i just don't want to deal with it. so i am not. and in a true kindergarten crush sort of way, i will most likely just ignore the situatin and him until i am back at school. and then i can send a little message explaining how sorry i am that i didn't get to say goodbye before i left and that maybe i'll see him throughout the year. if not then definitely next summer. i am cutting this rope now and letting that boat float wherever else it needs to, because it isn't docking here. he's cute, but definitely not worth it. sorry buddy.